It's Over

Mrs. Nuccio (don't worry -- you don't know her) told me recently that I was the smartest kid she ever knew. I hadn't seen her since I was eleven years old and on my way to Space Camp, and she came up to me at my sister's wedding last year and told me about all the great things she had assumed I would do with my life.

Then she asked me what I was doing with my life.

At the time, I was unemployed. I had just walked away from everything and everyone I knew, and I was a month into my new life in a new city. I'm sure she left that conversation thinking she had been wrong about her initial assessment of me.

The thing is, she wasn't wrong. I am incredibly smart. And I obviously don't have any difficulty telling you about it. It's not bragging when it's the truth, right? I just happen to be one of those people who hasn't lived up to her potential. And for the time being, it's pretty likely that I will hover in that "below potential" range. That's just the way things go when you get a useless degree and then spend five years not doing a lick of work because someone else is taking care of you. When you do that, it means you're bound to not be able to do exactly what you want to do with your life, and also make a ton of money doing it.

So while I'm thankful that I've found a full-time job that doesn't have me spending my days digging ditches, the compromise is that I have no other time to do anything else. I have to work some hours at a second job, too, and that means that I can't watch Oprah every day. And that means that if I get behind on work, Oprah has to go to the back burner. And before you know it, there are a ton of episodes piled up, and no time in the foreseeable future to either watch or write about them.

Oh, and the television is broken. And I didn't notice until today, so I don't even know if it was able to record this past week's episodes of Oprah. And even if they're recorded, I won't be able to watch them because the picture is so messed up on my television. So I will continue to get further and further behind until at least Wednesday, when Geek Squad is going to figure out what the hell is going on.

And I'm in the process of trying to find a new apartment. It's a long story, but we are leaving our current place by June 1, which means I'll spend the month of May either looking for a new place or moving out of this place and into that new place. The point is, I don't have time.

So, I give up. Yep, just like that. I have so much stress right now, and I can't continue to worry about whether or not I can keep up with this project I should have never started in the first place.

There's a chance I'll watch the finale of the show, assuming I'm not in the process of moving that day. But it's not like I'll have a hard time learning what happened. Something tells me Oprah has a little bit of pull in the media. She's not going out with a whimper.

I, however, am.

Thanks for reading.